27 August 2009

it's just not working...

I thought I could do it
I thought I could keep two blogs going
since I never really found what I was looking for in this blog
my heart just isn't in it
so today
I say good bye to
unmade life
in hopes of finding a very "made" life somewhere else
just maybe
it's where I've been all along
thank you
for being along with me on this relatively short ride
everyone of you made it so worth it for me
to at least try

25 August 2009

hold on...

no matter how hard we try
there will always be bumps in the road
to slow us down
to frustrate us
to question where we're going in the first place
to make us stop completely and turn around

21 August 2009

I went anyway...

I saw the no trespassing sign
but I couldn't resist the pull that wished me closer
to what I believe
was once a tiny cottage in a fairy tale
when I turned to walk away
the soft flutter of a wing graced my cheek
making me believe even more

15 August 2009

when you're a boy...

it's good to take a jumping break
after playing in the fields
eating donut balls
drinking red kool-aid until your lips are permanently stained
finding a catepilliar larger than a vienna sausage
on a summer day

13 August 2009

living softly...but with a voice

alone but not lonely

"if I had a whole day to do whatever I wanted to do"
"a day to do whatever I wanted"
describes almost every day I've had this summer
so I'm not complaining
unfortunately I wasted a few of them doing laundry that could have waited
making phone calls that weren't important
watching movies I've already seen
I should have been out living a bit more
summer runs away so quickly and I spend hours looking over my shoulder
wondering where it went
when the days start to get shorter
for the rest of this summer
I'm going to be living
a bit more openly
a bit louder
a bit more wild
I'm feeling awake and alive and curious
I don't want to miss a thing

10 August 2009

yes, I know...

a little home for you

just like me
you want one of these
a little home where the floor boards squeak
under your feet
when you're up in the middle of the night
for a glass of water
a little home where even when the windows are pinched tightly closed
breezes quietly flutter in
land on your cheeks like newly hatched butterflies
a little home where the lamps turned on at dusk
reach out to you like a life preserver
bring you home

08 August 2009

mostly weeds...

mostly weeds

so often there is beauty surrounding us
almost blinding us
we don't see it
why do we point over there and say
"oh, that's so beautiful"
everything right next to it is just as beautiful
yet we don't see it
we don't even notice it
at least
let's look at everything with fresh eyes
be blinded
the beauty we breathe in everyday

04 August 2009

I need a can of black spray paint...

quite often
the writing on the wall is all you need
~go over us and we will get up again~
kind of powerful
don't you think

03 August 2009

a month ago, already....

a month ago today I was standing on the top of pike's peak
visiting the olympic training center
what happened
where did it go
you'd think I would have noticed
something passing in front of me as quickly as these past four weeks have
I think it's time for me to start appreciating the days better than I do
which can only mean one think
~less blinking of course~

01 August 2009


when I have a house near the beach
with a kitchen large enough to hold a ten foot chalkboard
where a chalky note
"the chef has taken an indefinite leave of absence"
you'll find
me riding me around on this
the precious cargo will be towels, sunscreen and a good book
want to join me
I was instantly in love with it when I saw it
on the blog
that has given me more inspiration over the past year than any other
it's the story of nie
her family
how she is surviving
after almost dying
~in a horrific plane crash with her husband~
the surgeries, the skin grafts, the pain
the pain
of not being able to hold her children who didn't recognize her for a long time
the pain
of moving her body
the pain
of not wanting to look at herself in the mirror
the pain
from just breathing somedays
then there's the love
a love
like nothing you've ever seen before
so when I have a tough day
it's easy to go here and remind myself that things aren't so bad after all